After a long day of workplace , I was looking forth to take flight to Lazy Egg , my virtual island in Nintendo ’s young Animal Crossing game . What I found was a tropical paradise under siege . thespian from across the internet were pounding at my island ’s room access . For over an hour , they came flooding in , effectively crashing my game . In their munition , these strange visitant all carried the same affair : Brassica rapa .

It was n’t supposed to be like this . With its storybook esthetic , Animal Crossing : New Horizons promises a relaxing escape from a not - so - gentle world . Unsurprisingly , the cutesy homesteading simulator has become a bang hit during lockdown . But on Tuesday dark , as players bombarded me with tweets , textual matter , and decimeter , my secret island felt more like my own personal hell .

You could argue that this was New Horizons work as designed . There ’s an in - game mechanic where players can speculate on turnips , buying them from a fluid - nosed fuzz at one price and selling them to a pair of raccoon blood brother for another . ( Players tongue-in-cheek refer to this as “ the stalk mart . ” ) Crucially , prices do n’t just motley day - to - sidereal day , but also island - to - island . For the thespian who stargaze of make it braggart , having a friend on another island with sky - high Brassica rapa cost is like acquire the drawing .

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Screenshot: Victoria Song ( (Gizmodo)

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At noontide on an otherwise ordinary daytime , I checked my turnip price , and lo , it was through the roof . Raccoon twins Timmy and Tommy were offer to corrupt turnip for a whopping 602 gong — the in - game currency — apiece . In general , a price under 100 is bad and one over 300 is reasonably outstanding . After I posted the 602 physique in my workplace Animal Crossing chatroom , I watched my fellow worker ’ iris diaphragm transfer into dollar signs .

Party at Victoria ’s island ! Are you opening the gate now ? During oeuvre minute ? Haha , just kidding ! I started getting DMs from folk at the company I ’d only ever talked to in passing — not that I minded . Getting to cognise more coworkers despite societal distancing is a perquisite of playing , not a loading .

While I eventually ran back inside my house, I had to face the turnip music and chase after tips like it was a scavenger hunt.

While I eventually ran back inside my house, I had to face the turnip music and chase after tips like it was a scavenger hunt.Screenshot: Victoria Song ( (Gizmodo)

A little after 5:30 p.m. , I made a critical error . I tweeted out a screenshot of my turnip price , jest , “ RIP my island tonight when all my friend get thru . ” second base after post , I had strangers on Twitter asking to visit . At 5:55 p.m. , my workplace messaging app blew up with calls to open up my island ’s gates . At 6 p.m. , the first wave of visitors arrived .

I had planned to cover from the turnip horde in my virtual home , sitting on my virtual lounge , watch over my Malus pumila boob tube . ( In this guinea pig , an apple - shaped goggle box . ) This was unenlightened . Every time a player arrives on your island , the game shows you a cute vivification introducing the visitor . It takes about 15 seconds , which is all right when it ’s just one or two masses . But with all of the air traffic on Tuesday , I was basically trapped , only managing a few steps before the dire invigoration began again .

Back in the real world , my headphone was vaunt up as friends , coworkers , and acquaintances reached out through every possible platform to say they could n’t get in . Elsewhere , my Dodo Code — basically my island ’s address — was passed around , letting mass I did n’t know visit . And throughout it all , my anxiety rocket , even though logically I knew there was no reason for this .

There’s no real way to kiss in Animal Crossing, so this is as close as me it gets for me and my fiancé.

There’s no real way to kiss in Animal Crossing, so this is as close as me it gets for me and my fiancé.Screenshot: Victoria Song ( (Gizmodo)

The night culminated in Brianna Wu — congressional candidate , video secret plan developer , and friend of a friend — asking to visit . She made over 2 million bells , left me a generous 99,000 bell steer , andlater call me America ’s greatest herowhen yet another friend asked at 9:45 p.m. if my gates were still opened .

They were not .

It ’s not like I came out of it with nothing . While not everyone who visited tipped , those who did go forth around half a million bells in total . Still , by the prison term 10 p.m. twine around , it felt like angelic alleviation . Part of me felt guilty I had n’t been generous enough to let random players onto my island . A bigger part of me like I ’d lie about my prices exclusively . enceinte is the head that wears the turnip cap .

A wholesome moment.

A wholesome moment.Screenshot: Victoria Song (Gizmodo)

If you ’ve never fiddle Animal Crossing : New Horizons , it ’s a wholesome game with a in darkness capitalist undercurrent . You drop your days on your own private island , playing garb - up , paying off your home loanword , and catching critters . finally , you start originate the position , building base like stores , bridges , and roads . It ’s kind of like veridical life , except your income actually reflect the effort you put in and there are endearing beast friends with punny name .

New Horizons can be play alone , but it further playing together online , making the game a commodious virtual stamping ground in self - isolation — one that comes with a built - in activity . I ’ve had Nintendo ’s Switch game console for a little over a twelvemonth . Before Animal Crossing I had exactly one “ protagonist ” on the platform . Now I have 39 .

Sweetly , the game has put me back in physical contact with friends I have n’t spoken to in years , including a high schooling friend who is now a doctor in Florida fight down covid-19 on the front demarcation . He called one twenty-four hours to ensure that I was n’t “ one of the stupid unity ” ignoring social distancing good word . He told me heartbreaking stories about his covid-19 - incontrovertible patients , how some had already died , and how the state was doing diddly-shit to aid his low hospital . He also recite me he was on day 12 of a 14 - day oeuvre week , and how if he did n’t call his parent every night , he awake up to dozen of substance because they ’d convinced themselves he was beat .

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This incredibly sober conversation terminate with : “ Yo , Vee , are you playing Animal Crossing ? ” That turned into design to visit each other ’s islands , which turned into further plans to exchange in - game item , and , of course , sell turnip . During voice chats , discussions of island logistics were pepper with asides about casual life . Do you require this magnetic tongue wrack ? Work still sucks , we ’re getting deluge with covid-19 patients now . Shit , I have this poop katana . You want that ?

I ’m grateful that a TV secret plan give us something to speak about beyond disease and demise . In the retiring few workweek , we ’ve texted more than we have in the last year . A part of me is also incredibly sad knowing that without the worldly concern going to shit , there ’s a good luck we would n’t have .

I ’d wish to say that the Great Turnip Fiasco was a one - off in an otherwise blissful experience . But something is not quite right-hand about the biz marketed asthe perfect diversionin these tumultuous times . Until last week , it had been my refuge from the doom and gloom associated with the fresh coronavirus . The worse the news got , the further and further I retreated into the game .

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The turn point came when my fiancé was forced to present a dinnertime intervention . “ Babe , ” he said . “ You have to hold back playing Animal Crossing and wipe out . Your island is n’t go anywhere . ”

I brandish him off with a “ Yes , yes ! I ’m coming ! I just involve to finish selling these tarantula . ”

I did not come to the table for at least 15 minutes , maybe more . I sold the Lycosa tarentula but then got perturb by the wares the rascally raccoon twins were selling . After that , I obviously had to unload my newfangled purchase . By the time I was done , I could finger the tension radiating from my fiancé .

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“ Are you wild ? ” I ask .

“ No . ”

“ Are you certain you ’re not angry ? ”

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“ I just wish you were with me in this world , instead of always off in a virtual one . ”

The run-in sting , but he had a point . Since Animal Crossing dropped on March 20 , my sight has narrow down to the dimensions of a game console silver screen . When I wake up , I roll over and reach for my Switch and the biography I ’ve created on my island . I change my embodiment ’s getup so she ’s ready to set off the day — which involve melt down to get daily fillip decimal point , watering flowers , checking morning white turnip prices , and collecting seashells on the beach .

While I do this , my fiancé makes java , breakfast , the bed , showers , brush his tooth , offload the dish washer , takes out the trash , and gets quick for employment . Despite my virtual self sticking to a healthy daily routine , back in the literal human beings , I am an un - showered slob trying to get in as much meet time before I have to log onto work .

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It may have started out innocently enough , but my obsession with the game has turned me into a delinquent asshole .

In my defense , we ’re living with two pets in a 550 - square - foot studio apartment . When we were both at our job for most of the day , it was easy to make our cramped quarters work . Now , it ’s a incessant effort to avoid cabin pyrexia . When I start to experience claustrophobic , the plot let me hook out to a four - room business firm with lots of sunshine , works , and non - Ikea piece of furniture .

The Brassica rapa incident was nerve-racking , but technical issue were n’t the real problem . My partner had just had a problematical solar day at piece of work . Instead of being present with him , I was shepherd booster , coworkers — and , candidly , some strangers — to turnip glory . I had to be strong in turning down several pleading requests to keep my island open . Most people were chill about it . Some were n’t . Over fourth dimension , the game that was suppose to be uplifting had become a social mire where no matter what I did , I was letting someone down .

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At its good , the game is a salve for loneliness — not a cure . One recent even , I visit my coworker Catie ’s island during a meteor shower . In the biz , you could get uncommon star fragment by bid on fall stars . I had call in tired of to forge that forenoon because of a killer migraine that left me vomiting from sickness . You ’d conceive a sick day would ’ve been the perfect sentence to binge a video biz , but the bright screen hurt my eyes . I spend the day mopping my os frontale with a cockeyed towel , fret that my digital flower gardens would fail if I did n’t go down on it up and water them .

That nighttime , I played through the brain - cleave hurting to get those adept fragments . The most soothing part of my 24-hour interval was put up with a virtual Catie on a drop overlook the ocean . The shooting star were fall , my migraine ebbed , and it was peaceful . For a few minutes , everything was n’t so spoiled . But then I left her island , and the migraine was still there .

When I bought Animal Crossing , I also bought into the narrative that the game was going to be the thing that get me through societal distancing . I wanted to believe it could fill the gaps between therapy sessions , my anxiousness about media layoffs , and missing my friends . And it does , to an extent . I just let it get out of ascendance . I cared too much about turnip prices , virtual flowers , and build a not - veridical kitchen in a not - existent household . Things that ultimately do n’t weigh and are just a Band - Aid on the injury that is closing off - relate depression . What happen in a month or two when people move on to the next Fun Consumer Good and the world is still frightful ? Will Animal Crossing still be the perfect secret plan for this earned run average then ?

Photo: Jae C. Hong

After our suppertime talk , I invited my fiancé ’s in - biz lineament to Lazy Egg as an excuse . My island came with a heart - shaped pond on a cliff . I took it upon myself to imbed some tulip , append a garden bench , and rearrange the cerise trees for peak romantic vibes . We sat there in the game together for a few mo and I receipt the manner I had been a dork these preceding few weeks and promise to get it together . Then we both logged off for a date in real life .

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